Attitude of Gratitude.

I need to journal about my numbers today, but I'm feeling there is something more important to make note of in my journey called life.  Numbers are already recorded, but my experiences are merely memories locked in my head that I wish to remember and perhaps when needed, look back upon.

I don't really know why, but I still feel somewhat uncomfortable around Kung fu members. Except the kids of course. They are easy to relax around. As the parade approached, I got a bit more nervous, or perhaps anxious. Lots of people, and most I feel a bit reserved around. I did have the time to attend and so I did. I felt a bit quiet and shy as we waited there for our turn to roll on down the parade route. Some people that I am around more, I visited with a bit. I knew that if I just pushed myself to talk to more people, I would loosen up and be OK. But it was difficult for me to step outside my comfort zone of hiding quietly alone.

I can be the life of the party so-to-speak, if I just relax and let myself enjoy the experience. I never used to be quite this uncomfortable around crowds. It seems to have gotten tougher the older I get. I talk to strangers at work all the time as if I have known them for years. And I am sincere in my conversations and when I tell them to enjoy their day. So why can I not relax and be like that at Kung fu?

Besides all that, as the parade went on, I had a few very emotional moments. Emotional in a good way. People that knew me, and picked me out in the crowd yelled hello, and waved as if their arm was going to fall off. That touched me. Some of them were from the church that I don't attend much anymore. They seemed most excited to see me.  Some were from work, and some were kids from Kung fu.

Another thing that touched me, was the feeling of bringing the school and all the good it represents, out directly in the public eye.

Then there were the lions. Some of them gently approaching little ones, whose wide eyes glazed with wonderment. Protective parents watching close by.

The seniors was another big teary moment for me. Seeing them all lined up on the sidewalk awaiting this wonderful event that breaks up the usual routine of their day. Their smiles, and waves filled my heart with joy. One lady in particular, made eye contact with me, mouthed hello, as she waved her aging arm.

As the parade went on, I wanted to start waving my arm to just anyone, and everyone in the crowd. I felt so strong a desire, but my attitude of keeping myself in check made me hold back. But then as others in the crowd waved at me, I found it so easy to wave back, and to wave even at those who were not waving at me. I started to really get into it, and wished that I had pushed my positive self forward, right from the beginning, instead of waiting and letting myself ease into it.

The most dearest thing to my heart that I got from being there in the parade, was a huge serving of gratitude.  Silent River Kung Fu really is all about families within, and helping hands reaching out. Again the tears that were even harder to force back, as I watched the older kids looking out for the younger ones. The youth united in goals, passions, and desire to find mastery, were laughing, joking, supporting each other in a multitude of ways, and even hugging together, instead of being a bully or trying to tear each other down.  And at the head of this great organization, Sifu Brinker on the drum, seem to me, to be announcing, "we are here.  Silent River Kung fu.  We are humbled to bring you joy this day on this great event where all friends and families come together to enjoy the day, and celebrate together as a unified community".

My heart burst with gratitude for that one day 20 years ago, when my family moved to Stony Plain from Prince George, and while out driving around to see what the community had to offer, I came across a big sign. SILENT RIVER KUNG FU.  Let's check that out, I said to the kids. And that's just what we did.