Meeting #1

Well, it starts. Yesterday I attended the first meeting for the dog team in the I Ho chuan. It was a joint meeting with this years team that is just about to finish up, the rooster team. There were a lot of people there, and some I had never seen before, but most I knew who they were, even though I don't work with them or see them often. That made me realize that my participation in the Kung fu school is somewhat isolated to Tues and Thurs. I teach on those days, plus my curriculum class is also on one of those days. So I don't get to the school to see the students that attend on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays.  Maybe I should show up at those classes once in a while to help out.

Anyways, back to the meeting. I did not feel comfortable there at all. I didn't really feel I belonged. A lot of people in that group, are dedicated students. They are at the school a lot, and they pitch in at most of the events the school puts on. I do not. I guess that's why I feel like an outcast. The rebellious black belt. I would bet that no one in that group thought this of me, except for myself. I know this to be a pattern of my thoughts, and it needs to be broken. I also know that being on the dog team this coming year, will help me to fit in. I will need to participate, make a presence at the school and online, and allow people to know who I am.

Sifu Brinker asked all black belts on the dog team to put up there hand. There were three of us. I was the senior belt of the three. I know that holding that rank, there will be expectations put on me; some by the other students, and some by Sifu Brinker. That scares me. I don't like being the centre of attention, and I am not creative like Sifu Rybak when it comes to designing demos. By nature, I tend to be quite shy. When I am in my shy state, I come across as being a snob, and that would not be beneficial. I know I will have to step up to the plate this coming year, and make some home runs. Well, at least get on base. I talked to my friend about this last night. He asked if this would mean stepping outside of my comfort zone. I said yes. Then he asked if stepping outside of my comfort zone would mean personal growth. I had to answer yes.  "Would that be a good thing."  "Yes".  I told him it would be difficult. He said that 20% of what we do to attain personal growth SHOULD be difficult.

I know that as I get to know everyone on the team, and as we get working together, I will feel more comfortable, and hopefully fit into the leadership role I need to take.  After the meeting, I stayed at the school for 3 hours after everyone left. I worked on my form that I am trying to put together. At first there were many frustrations, and I was starting to get upset at myself.   I persevered, and by the time I left the school at about 6:30, I felt well accomplished. I had made a lot of headway on my form, and had a strong positive outlook. This is how it will be for the I Ho chuan. There will be frustations, and I know I will get upset with myself. I also know that it will all end well, with a healthy, positive attitude, and accomplishments. Stick with the process, focus on the process, and the end results will work themselves out.